I was pushing my luck.
Well, actually I was pushing a cart at the grocery store but Ford and I were pushing our luck because it was dangerously close to nap time, but I knew we had to stop by the grocery store before heading home if I had any chance of having dinner ready at a decent hour.
My son was sitting in the cart, crying, and I handed him my phone and turned on a YouTube lullaby video. (Please know, that before having kids I would have judged you if I saw you doing this, and now I offer up an apology to all the moms out there that I have judged. I am one of those moms now.) I didn’t realize how loud the volume was on my phone until I noticed that everyone in the produce aisle was also listening to Humpty Dumpty.
I quickly turned down the volume and said aloud, “I’m sure not everyone in the store cares to sing along with us, Ford. There was a lady that was shopping next to me that overheard me and said, “I was just thinking to myself, ‘How does she listen to that all day?’” To which I replied, “Well, it’s better than a crying baby…”
In the moments that followed that interaction, I became insecure.
Why? Why would a harmless opinion from another person affect me so?
I really wanted her to say, “Oh, it’s alright. He is so cute! It doesn’t matter…”
But in reality, her words confirmed my fears that I didn’t know I had.
Quite a few of these moments have come up recently as my son so desperately tries to communicate his wants and needs with me, but doesn’t have the vocabulary to do so yet. Tantrums are a part of every day, every hour. At the end of a normal day, I often have to remind myself that I am truly grateful for these moments of utter emotional exhaustion because it means that my child is developing as he should.
Tantrums are normal.
For as many moments of doubt that have occurred recently, there have been women who have reached out to reassure me that I am doing okay.
Please don’t stay silent when you see someone struggling. Whatever the issue may be, motherhood related or not, if you have been there and can offer a moment of light, do it. You can never know the power of an encouraging word in a moment of uncertainty.
“Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as you are already doing.” 1 Thessalonians 5:11
Coast x Coast Motherhood 